Juggling Work and Motherhood

“Balancing work, motherhood, and personal aspirations can be challenging, but it’s essential to be compassionate and flexible with oneself during this period.”

Not too long ago I received an email with the request to write a blog post on how to ‘juggle home, work, and motherhood while still making time to be the best illustrator you can be.’

I wish I had a simple answer to give on how to manage it all with ease, but the truth is I don’t have one. I, too, still have days that are harder than others. 

You see, since my daughter was born I struggled for a long time to juggle these demands (especially as a single parent.) Not only was I ashamed for not working as consistently as before, but also for not being able to care for my daughter the way I had always imagined. And everyday I felt guilt and shame for not knowing how to handle it all.

What I has helped me, though, is accepting my new reality with as much compassion, empathy, and grace as possible.

Now there’s no getting around that becoming a parent changes our lives and work practices. The new responsibilities that motherhood brings has changed the way I show up in the world—not only for my work and artistry but for myself and others, too.  And over time, I understood how unfair and unkind I was being by judging and berating myself as a new mom.  

Instead, I’ve learned that it’s okay to accept my limitations and be more flexible and informal with my work practice. And if there are resources I can use that will make my new reality easier, I accept them with open arms.

“Allow your art and work practices to be very flexible and informal as you weather this season of your life.” - Lindsay Mack

To juggle the responsibilities of both work and motherhood, we need to give ourselves grace for learning how to tend to both. We need to understand that our limited time and energy now is more precious than ever before. And we need to let go of the unfair expectations that we place upon ourselves (and that society places on women as well.)

Remember, this season is temporary. There are so many new parents like you and me who are finding ways to juggle the new responsibilities that parenthood brings. And as we grow and adapt as parents, so will our lives and our art practices. So go easy on yourself. This season will eventually pass and a new one with different challenges and surprises and blessings will take its place.

If you’re a mom who’s juggling work as an illustrator and caretaking your little ones, please share what has helped you in the comments below. I’m sure we could all find solidarity with one another’s journey into motherhood.

With love and care,

Ebony

Your Art is for You, Too

When we do this work of making art for others, we can betray and deny ourselves joy by always giving away our talent, time, and energy. Remember your art is for you, too.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always loved to make art for other people.

It has always brought me joy and pleasure no matter what challenges I was facing in my life. Not only that, but it also gave me purpose, confidence, and a way to show my love and appreciation for friends and family.

But what I loved most of all about creating art for others and myself was the feeling of calm that it would provide me with. 

Making art gave me inner peace.

As I grew older though, things began to change. What once gave me so much pleasure to do for others began to fill me with anxiety. 

My early schooling, for example, set the groundwork for this disconnection. In college and art classes, I learned that art making was only worthwhile if others deem it so or if it was profitable.  No longer was making art for art’s sake a noble endeavor. Instead, art was supposed to only be enjoyed, valued, and judged by our teachers, peers, and the outside world. 

Having internalized this way of thinking for so long, I didn’t realize the harm I was inflicting on my psyche. No longer was art making a personal and self-exploratory experience of joyful self-expression; it was now fair game for everyone and anyone to consume, critique, and regurgitate.

I was so focused on pleasing others with my art that I had forgotten how to enjoy making art for myself. And overtime, this way of being slowly diminished my spirit.

Something had to change.

Thankfully, after many nights of quiet self-reflection, I had an epiphany:

We artists need to have balance and boundaries for our artistry when we make art for others, and we need to have some compassion for ourselves.

When we’re kids, we create freely and uninhibitedly from our hearts with no expectations and pressures placed on us to be perfect, please others, or strategize how to make a profit. We create because it’s fun and it fills our cups. And it still can even if we are making a living from our artistry. 

Creating is an activity that is always available to us for nourishment.  So long as we choose to keep our relationship with our art just for us, we can set limits on how our energy is used and who has access to our creative reserves. We do not have to remain open to any and everyone nor does it have to be for everyone and everyone’s gaze. Nor do we have to exclude ourselves from enjoying the art that we make for others. It can be just for our closest friends and family.  And it can be for our own enjoyment, too. 

So, if you have accepted some toxic scripts about what it means to be an artist like I have, then know that you can unlearn them.  You can reclaim what is yours and what will always be.